Being visible in your business can be an unnerving experience for many small business owners. ‘Visibility’ may not have been something we ever really gave much thought to before starting a business. After all, many of us started our businesses by following our passions, not through a desire to be seen!

Yet different experiences throughout our lives shape us into the perfectly imperfect humans that we are. And being a beautifully flawed human brings its own set of challenges around how we feel whilst we’re becoming the face of our brand. With a little nudge in the right direction, this is something we can certainly learn to manage, or better still, embrace!

Which is exactly why I’ve created this She Who Dares guest blog series this year – to invite other women forging their own paths to share their experiences and what they’ve learnt. Since together we can be stronger and braver. A rising tide lifts all boats.

So to kick off this series, the brilliant Sophie Carefull, Bristol based Self-belief Coach, is sharing some of her top tips for becoming comfortable with being visible in your business. So if you’re ready to stop getting in your own way, read on!

Emma x

Getting Comfortable With Being Visible In Your Business

As creative business owners, we know how important it is to let people see and get to know us. “People buy from people” is a cliché because it’s true! And yet, the idea of being visible in your business as the face of your brand can bring up all sorts of self-doubt and imposter feelings.

I’m Sophie, I’m a Certified Self-belief Coach and have also been a self-employed personal branding photographer for over six years, so I’ve learnt a thing or two about how to feel more comfortable with visibility. I hope the tips I’ve shared below will help you feel more confident to be the face of your business and reach more of your dream customers!

 

Check your assumptions

Before you make a start on being more visible in your business, I encourage you to do a bit of an audit of the thoughts, beliefs and assumptions you have about what it means to be the face of your business. Try to suspend any self-judgement and just ask yourself what stories you’re telling yourself about who gets to be visible, and what might happen if you show your face online.

You may notice thoughts like…

“Nobody’s interested in me, they just want to know about my products or services.”

“I’m not young/thin/attractive enough to be the face of my brand.”*

“If I get more visible, I’ll be judged and criticised.”

“I’ll show up online when I’ve got more qualifications/experience/clients.”

 

 

First of all, I want to say that if any of those resonated with you, nothing has gone wrong. It’s perfectly natural to have fears and worries about being visible, because it requires a level of vulnerability that will almost always trigger self-doubt the first few times you do it. It really does get easier the more you practise, and we all have to move through that uncomfortable phase at the beginning when showing up can feel like wading through treacle.

*I also want to add here that lots of the narratives we’ve absorbed about being seen or “attracting attention to ourselves,” particularly as women, are rooted in the sexist, racist, ableist patriarchy. The unrealistic beauty ideals that this system is responsible for can become internalised, and this stops us from taking up the space we are all inherently worthy of.

So, if the way you look stops you from showing up, I want to invite you to reflect on why that might be, and whose ‘attractiveness rules’ you might be subconsciously trying to conform to. I can also highly recommend diversifying the content that you consume, because the more accepting we are of how others look, especially if they don’t fit the mould of how a woman “should” (in the eyes of the patriarchy) look, the more self-acceptance we can offer ourselves too.

Once you’ve identified some of the specific stories you’ve been telling yourself about visibility, offer yourself compassion. Let the scared part of you know that you understand why it wants you to stay hidden. And then start to loosen the grip of those stories. You don’t have to go from believing one thing to believing the complete opposite in an instant, but can you open your mind to the possibility that something else could be true?

 

 

Start small

As with anything that makes us feel nervous, it’s a good idea to take showing up online one step at a time. Let yourself adjust to the experience of being seen, especially if you notice it saps your energy or triggers anxious thoughts. There is absolutely nothing wrong with you for needing to take things at a gentle pace. Slow and steady wins the race!

Starting small might look like posting a photo of yourself where you’re standing in a wider landscape, perhaps even facing away from the camera or silhouetted against the sky. Anything with you in the frame counts! And you can gradually build up to sharing photos where you’re more clearly visible, before moving onto videos of your workspace with a voiceover chatting through what you’re filming. Next, you might set up your phone against a pile of books and film a timelapse of your hands typing on your laptop, then next time include your face in the video too. Before you know it, the idea of speaking directly to the camera on Instagram Stories won’t feel so unattainable, because you’ll have warmed up.

Just like how you wouldn’t try and run 10 miles on the first day of half-marathon training, you don’t need to expect the same of yourself when it comes to showing your face online either. Instead, go for a gentle jog, and always remember to stretch afterwards too! This could look like having a quiet sit down with a cup of tea, or getting out for five minutes of fresh air after you’ve posted something that took some courage to share. Don’t overlook your progress, and be sure to reward yourself as you go.

 

 

Embrace your quirks

When you first start getting visible and representing your business online, you might find that you fall into trying to look and sound “professional,” which is an extremely narrow and unhelpful box to try and squish yourself into! This is especially true if you’ve come from a corporate background where this limited definition was modelled and encouraged, so it’s completely understandable that you might default to this when you become self-employed.

However, by presenting a ‘business persona’ who differs from the wonderful person you are when you’re with your nearest and dearest, you lose out on the opportunity to truly connect with kindred spirits online. The more you show up as who you truly are, the more of the right people will be drawn to you; the ones who you don’t need to convince to hire you, and who’ll be a pleasure to work with.

If you’re an introvert (welcome to the club!), this might look like actually talking about this in your content. You could mention that you need lots of time to recharge after spending time with people, physically or virtually! You’ll be surprised how many people will relate. Introvert or not, don’t be afraid to show the many different sides of your personality. By sharing what’s true for you, you’ll begin to forge some really meaningful relationships with potential clients, collaborators and cheerleaders for your business.

 

 

Know your boundaries

Another way you can support yourself to feel more confident being visible online is to set some ground rules for yourself around what you will and won’t share on social media. I think there’s a bit of a misconception that being the face of your business has to mean inviting strangers on the internet to see every corner of your life in great detail. This is totally not the case!

You are the boss (in your business and your life), so you get to decide what you’re happy to show the world, and what stays private for you and your loved ones. Some people feel fine talking about and showing the faces of their partner or children, for example, but this doesn’t mean you have to. I encourage you to define what a safe level of visibility would look like for you, and then drop the guilt about not doing anything that doesn’t fit within those boundaries. You don’t owe your Instagram followers anything, remember!

 

 

Be kind to yourself

If there was one thing I could urge all business owners to prioritise, it would be practising self-compassion. It’s helpful in most scenarios, but especially when we’re making brave moves, stretching ourselves and expanding our comfort zones.

We can often mistake self-flagellation for motivation, at great cost to our own wellbeing. You can be motivated and productive, and achieve things that feel challenging (like being more visible online) without being horrible to yourself, I promise!

What might it be like to speak to yourself as you would a close friend who felt nervous about trying something new? How might that feel? Give it a go and notice what happens.

Self-compassion comes in many forms aside from just the way we speak to ourselves. As you practise being more visible in your business, make sure you also show yourself kindness in the form of self-care. Eat well, prioritise getting a good night’s sleep, make time for the people and things that bring you joy! A big part of what we know as external confidence comes from feeling good internally, so don’t forget to treat yourself as a whole human, not just a business owner, and regularly make time for whatever makes you feel most like yourself!

You’re doing a brilliant job. Keep going.

If you’d like to find out more about my work as a coach and mentor, check out my website and get in touch.

 

Sophie is a Certified Self-belief Coach for introverted creatives and a business mentor for branding photographers. Her self-employed journey began in 2015 when she became a wedding photographer, before specialising in personal branding photography and working with hundreds of business owners all over the UK and across Europe.

In 2020, Sophie trained as a professional coach (see full credentials here) and now supports her clients to develop long-lasting self-belief so they can grow their business in the ways they truly want to, with less overwhelm and more joy.

Sophie lives in Bristol with her husband Sam and their adopted dog Otis. She’s an introvert with a love for second-hand fashion, colourful interiors and a good old nostalgic sitcom.

 

Image of Sophie, by Sophie! Other images of Cathrin Cochrane, Social Magpie Design, taken by Emma Jackson Photography.